The smell, your senses, how the gold outline on the glass glimmers as the sun sets.
Accepting the day has ended, accepting all it's done for you. How the birds invaded your dreams, how his chest moving, a sign of his heart, his loving, kind heart keeping him alive becomes your souls focus as your eyelids flicker, alike the candle wick that ignites a smell.
THAT smell.
The smell of what was once a small detail of a night, identical to any other homogeneous item in the room that memories were made, stories told, vulnerability unlocked and where love truely triumphed.
The softness of his Peter Alexander robe on your skin, the words of early 2000 RNB playing as his laugh envelops the whole room.
His eyes sparkle and the joy of his amusement is evident. Your forehead betrays you as the realization of your next botox appointment is nearing all too fast.
‘Don't frown baby’ the words fill your ears now as they did then. Did he know? Or was it simply a moment shared between two souls, bodies entangled as the room became a solace, a place not of rest but of trust, of love and as the walls became translucent.
As the fingers pulled the weight of my entire body near.
Am I safe?
The carefree joy of trumpets, the melody, the treble bass clef enrapturing my ears
Nervous systems, calm, the sound of the ocean’s waves sound disappears as the car travels further from the soft warm sand, but the memory remains as close as the steering wheel in my hands as I twist and turn in the 5pm traffic.
Chapters ending, books boxed up with masking tape, my mouth able to speak freely, freedom to smile, to allow, to be, for the present is wrapped but the paper remains torn on the ground.
Fairtales invade the screen as your eyes are distorted by the concoction of colors invading your retinas.
Cocktails in hand that fateful night and like the prosecco poured into the pornstar she evolves into one of her many facets.
For who doesn’t love a Madonna and a whore?
Am I safe?
Time has told me, time has tipped me, tricked me, and given me life, given me highs as soft as the clouds I tilt my neck to see, lows as deep as triton's secrets.
The roller coaster, the feeling of wind, of my lips drying as my teeth shine in the sun for my smile is my best, my most valued for the eyes are the windows but a smile reflects a warm heart.
And baby I’m chasing summer.
